Doug Fister, Charlie Furbush, & The Football Factories International: The Balkans

“KD puts on a show at Rucker Park.
The Jays put on a show for Robbie.
And Randy Moss will be a no show this season.
(Tim: This should be a good show.)
(Sid: And the season after that.)
(Tim: We’ll see.)
(Sid: And the season after that, and after that. If he does stay retired is the point.)
(Tim: Correct.)
Famous run that bitch!” 

Welcome back TimandSid-izens from the long weekend. It’s hard to believe that we’re already into August and before you know it, the NBA preseason will be taking place….oh wait, the NBA filed two claims against players today, this “whose dick is bigger” contest won’t be ending anytime soon. But in the meantime, Sid is ready to go today, Timmy “Zachary” Micallef is present, and our boys Noon and Bronsteter are set to deliver some horns. Items up for discussion that may or may not be addressed include: Ubaldo Jimenez, Antonio Cromartie, Fedor, Brandon Marshall, World Cup Qualifying, Peyton Manning, Randy Moss, Nnamdi Asomugha, Eric Bedard, and theScore on SIRIUS 158. 

theScore, Tim and Sid: Uncut, and SIRIUS Radio Channel 158
To start off today’s show, the boys had some sad news for listeners of theScore Radio. As of September 1st, theScore Radio will no longer exist. Unfortunately, SIRIUS Satellite Radio decided to pull the plug on the station due to the recent merger with XM Radio Canada. While Tim and Sid: Uncut will remain at theScore for the TimandSid-izens, Tim goes on to “pour a little out for our fallen homies.” Sid agrees with those sentiments and says that with all the shuffling going on with the merger, SIRIUS 158 lost and became a victim.


Charlie Fister and Doug Furbush

Amazing news for fans of Otto Pfister and Michael Ryder. Over the weekend, the Seattle Mariners and the Detroit Tigers completed a deal that saw Charlie Furbush being shipped to the Seattle Mariners; the lefty for the Detroit Tigers was part of a 5 player trade. Furbush and two other minor leaguers will go to Seattle, in exchange for David Pauley and Doug Fister. The guys break into some hilarious discussion as they analyze the trade.

Tim: My thoughts are if Detroit slowly eases Fister into their rotation gently, he’ll fit in right away.
Sid: If you bring Fister into what is a dry rotation; a rotation that has been struggling, I think it’s tough. You might get a little uncomfortable.
Tim: And if it’s dry, you don’t want Doug Fister.
Sid: If it’s a nice moist situation, ripe for…a fluid situation…
Tim: Then that’s a better spot. 

The boys start jumping the shark here and Sid then goes on to relate the above trade to a little incident that happened to him over the past weekend. Sid, along with his beautiful wife, attended this past Sunday’s Roberto Alomar Day. As he was walking up the steps to his seats, a young TimandSid-izen screams out, “Yo Sid! Doug Fister. Fister hardly knew her!” and then went on to tweet it. I would have paid to have seen Mrs. Seixeiro’s face here – pure gold. Bronsteter brings up Charlie Furbush again in which Sid responds with, “You have to trim the rotation to get Furbush in. You don’t want an unmanicured bush in there who hasn’t pitched for awhile.” “Fister for Furbush.”, cried Tim.

Randy Moss Retires? Or Fishing For Suitors?

While Furbush and Fister were big news in baseball, most of the first segment this afternoon focused around the announcement that wide receiver Randy Moss was hanging up his cleats for good. Tied with Terrell Owens for most touchdowns (153), Moss filed his retirement papers with the league and seems to be gone for good; or will he? Sid’s not entirely sure this will be the last we see of him and Tim agrees with that statement. Micallef compares Moss to a little kid who’s sulking right now because there wasn’t enough interest for him come last week’s NFL free agency. Sid questions whether or not we’ll see a day when people retire and we’ll believe it, “Brett Favre has fucked it for everybody.” And this is true; how many times has the aging QB said he was done with the game only to show up the following season in a new jersey? Whatever happens, it’s hard not to believe that as this upcoming season progresses, there won’t be a team looking for his services come Week 4. Tim and Sid then go on to discuss whether or not Randy could be considered the best wide receiver of his generation. Tim finds this a hard question to answer but when you look at other guys like Terrell Owens, Hines Ward, Marvin Harrison, Issac Bruce, and Torry Holt, you can see that Moss was definitely one of the best in that class. If you watch the video below, you can see he made a lot of quarterbacks look good – sometimes all you had to do was throw that shit down the field.


The boys continue discussing Moss’ legacy and bring up the fact that “Randy Moss made defensive coordinators rethink things.”, Sid. “Randy Moss ran two routes, fast and faster.” Sid believes that history would have painted a better picture of him if he won a Superbowl, but for now, he’ll mostly be known as the troubled player with attitude issues. But for a guy who had 47 touchdowns from ’07 – ’09, it’s hard to believe that he’s even retiring. Those days are not too far gone. A listener writes in to the show and suggests that the career of Moss is similar to that of Allen Iverson. Tim agrees with those sentiments and draws comparisons to how they began their career, what they went through in the big leagues, and how their careers shrank. Sid agrees with the comparison but believes that “Randy Moss is A.I. in light speed.” As the first half of the show begins to wind down, the boys have some fun and bring up the time when Moss got fined $10,000 by the NFL for mooning. He was later asked by a reporter how he was going to pay the fine, in which he responded:


The boys continue to joke and laugh at Moss’ answer above and Sid asks, “You run over to the meter maid and put your balls on her face. Randy, why did you put your balls on her face?” to which Moss would hypothetically respond, “What’s balls on face to me?”

The NFL Dream Team and Jason Babin
The Philadelphia Eagles continued to add pieces this weekend to their roster. Besides Vince Young and Nnamdi Asomugha, the Eagles also signed Jason Babin, Cullen Jenkins, and Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie. Tim goes on to discuss that many people are already calling this team the NFL Dream team, even players such as Babin.

“Do you think that’s a bit too much”, asked Tim. Sid feels it would be okay for Nnamdi to tweet it but for Babin? That would be “like Udonis Haslem tweeting “We’re the Big Four bitch.” They also discuss how DeSean Jackson must be feeling right now in regards to all the recent acquisitions by the Eagles. As of right now, Jackson is only set to make $500,000 next season and for a player who I would call one of the MVP’s on that team, that’s not a lot of dough. Jackson wants to get paid and he deserves to get paid; according to Sid, he’d have no problem with this kid holding out. “He’s making a CFL salary.”

BoDog and Alex Trebek
Before Pizzo’s Update, Tim threw out the news that BoDog had picked the favourites to win the 2011-12 Superbowl and wonders if Sid knew who the favourite to win it all was. Bronsteter begins to play the Jeopardy theme song and then changes the topic completely to the recent news of the game show host, Alex Trebek. The 71-year old Trebek, awoke in his hotel room early in the morning last week to find a woman trying to steal personal items including cash and a bracelet. He then proceeded to chase her down but snapped his tendon in the process. Based on the details Trebek gave San Francisco police, the woman was later apprehended and booked for burglary and possession of stolen property. A HERO! This act of heroism only makes Sid wonder how Alex gets women in the club? What’s the line that he uses? “What is my dick?”, replied Tim. “This early automan empire stuck his dick in where?”, cried Noon. Eventually the boys get back on course and the odds are as follows:
1. Philadelphia Eagles: 3rd Favourite 9 – 1
2. Green Bay Packers: 2nd Favourite 7  -1
3. New England Patriots: The Favourite 6 1/2 – 1 

Interesting Facts From Pizzo’s Updates
Pizzo starts off the segment by referring to the Randy Moss soundbite above by playing the following track:

Nuts On Your ChinEazy E

Sid goes on to tell a story about when he attended a basement party years ago in Mississauga. The cops showed up to the party due to noise and just as they got there, the smart ass kid working the tables puts on N.W.A’s Fuck Da Police. The Dad got pissed and my guess is that everyone cleared out of there pretty quickly.
1. Braylon Edwards was alleged to have been on hand at South Bar in Michcigan when two members of his entourage got in a scuffle with employees. According to a report, the two individuals were arrested and one club staffer was reportedly cut with a kitchen knife, requiring 14 stitches. Edwards wasn’t directly involved with the scuffle, but he did tweet the following, “Dam. Get ya knuckles ready” and then “Don’t fight if. You don’t know how.” Edwards later used the same old excuse by every twitter fool by tweeting:

2. In order to wear No. 5, a number previously held by Vikings punter Chris Kluwe, Donovan McNabb entered a written agreement with his new teammate to promote the punter’s rock band, Tripping Icarus, during a press conference, donate $5,000 to charity, and buy Kluwe an ice cream cone.
3. San Antonio Spurs legend, David Robinson, is selling his home in San Antonio. The kicker? The house is on a street that was named after Robinson called “The Admiral’s Way”. Pizzo throws out the question, CUT or UNCUT? Selling a house on a street that’s named after you?

BREAKING NEWS! 
The Philadelphia Eagles agreed to a one-year contract with veteran running back for the Miami Dolphins, Ronnie Brown. Wow, I’m blown away. Both of the guys like this move and it only makes the backfield for the Eagles better. “DeSean Jackson just tweeted the following, “What the fuck?””, replied Sid. Hopefully for his sake, with all these signings, there’s money in there somewhere for Jackson. If there isn’t, “that ain’t right!”

2014 World Cup Qualifying News
The main focus of today’s second segment surrounded the released schedule and draws for FIFA’s 2014 World Cup qualifying. “Canada only made on the World Cup of soccer once, and it’s been a fucking disaster ever since.”, said Sid. According to Seixeiro, Canada will avoid Mexico and the United States until the last round of qualifying. They do however have to play Honduras and Cuba and if the team can get to the second spot, they could do it. With this kind of draw, “If they fuck up, it’s on them.”, cried Sid. Sid goes on to say that this was the kind of draw that Canada wanted and that “there’s guys on that team that think they are much better than they prove (De Rosario & de Guzman)…there’s a lack of cohesion.”, Sid. Canada are going to need all the help they can get. Other interesting match-ups to look for include:

1. Croatia vs. Serbia. Sid gets goosebumps just thinking about the match-up. Tim goes on to say that he hopes it will be safe, both for the fans and the players. They then go on to discuss the documentary The Real Football Factories International: The Balkans which ended by telling the story of how a hooligan took an opposing fan to a grave and raped him – If you want to get freaked out, go to 3:28 of the video below.

2. France drew Spain. Let’s just say that things don’t look too good for France because the second place team in that group won’t be going to the World Cup. Spain is a pretty good team if you haven’t noticed, they’re on a roll.
3. Italy drew Denmark

Fedor Emelianeko Is No Longer A Myth

Before Rapid Fire, the boys quickly touch on Fedor Emelianenko’s third straight loss this past Saturday. While there was some discussion as to whether Herb Dean should have stopped the fight, it was clear that Dan Henderson had control and Fedor was in a compromised position. A few more shots and it would have left no doubt. The guys discuss how it’s hard to believe that Fedor went 7 years without losing a fight and now he’s lost 3 in a row. Sid’s convinced that he should have signed with the UFC in 2009, but the idea of co-promoting with M1 Global soured the negotiations & White backed out. Fedor is still probably a draw but not to the same extent.

Rapid Fire
On today’s edition of Rapid Fire, Bronsteter actually put a call out on twitter for help from the TimandSid-izens requesting their best Either Or.
– Open OR close the lights? Turn off the damn lights man!
– Getting punched by Mike Tyson in the face OR receiving an Aroldis Chapman’s fastball to the gut? I’d take a fastball to the gut. Tyson would probably break my jaw, dislodge my brain, and literally break my face. I get married in December, I need to speak.
– Chips OR Cookies? I’m a cookie guy. Which one? It doesn’t matter.
– Braylon Edwards OR Plaxico Burress? I’ll throw Plaxico Burress a bone. Personally, I not a fan of Edwards at all.
– Better wrestling commentator, Jim Ross OR Gorilla Monsoon? Gorilla Monsoon hands down. There was only so much I could take of Ross’ high pitch squeal. And no, I didn’t ask Sansone what his thoughts were.
– If you could bring one CD to a deserted island, who would it be? Walter Ostanek OR Bobby McFerrin? Roll Out the Barrel should go to music hell.

Great episode today boys. Obviously there was a somber mood at theScore yesterday and for Pizzo, Tim, Sid, Noon, and Bronsteter to go in the studio and deliver a great Tim and Sid: Uncut was exceptional. It truly shows their professionalism and I appreciate that. The Fister/Furbush story was hilarious and while I didn’t quote the whole conversation, I’d advise listeners who missed it to check it out. The Randy Moss retirement discussion was Grade A – it’ll be interesting to see how it will play out this upcoming season. I agree with the boys that he’ll be back playing somewhere – the Eagles? Pizzo’s song Nuts On Your Chin was a highlight for updates and Sid’s discussion on the World Cup was good to hear even though the rape chat disturbed me after looking up the video. Solid Rapid Fire by Bronsteter – I personally like the fan touch from time to time. The show really knows how to interact with it’s fan. 9.5/10

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